“I still feel like I’m not allowed to want anything. The voice in my head says I’m selfish, ridiculous, or dramatic whenever I try to access my needs.”
“I feel like I’m at war with myself.”
“Sometimes I think it was easier to convince myself I didn’t have any wants or needs because then I wasn’t disappointed when they weren’t met.”
If last week’s episode on identifying your wants and needs left you feeling like some of these other listeners, you are far from alone. Many people deconstructing ideology from high demand religious and family systems struggle with this because of something called “childhood emotional neglect”.
When you grow up in a system where your emotional needs were invalidated, ignored, or just weren’t adequately addressed you learn to ignore your own emotions and the needs and desires your emotions communicate to you. You may even pick up the idea that your needs aren’t met because you aren’t worthy of having them met.
In this episode, we discuss what Childhood Emotional Neglect is and how it affects our ability to know our wants and needs and feel comfortable meeting them for ourselves or sharing them with others.
Brandt, Andrea, Ph.D., LMFT. 9 Signs of Childhood Emotional Neglect and 3 Ways to Heal. January, 2020. Psychology Today.
Morton, Kati, LMFT. 9 Signs of Childhood Emotional Neglect. August, 2022. YouTube.
DONATE TO THE PODCAST AND JOIN THE LIVE WEEKLY DISCUSSION:
Have you always wanted to discuss the ideas in the podcast live with Teri and the rest of the community? Do you have questions about how the podcast can be applied to your personal life? Do you have insights you’d like to share? We’re trying something new this year! Monthly donors will be invited to weekly live discussions and group coaching every Wednesday at 6:30pm Mountain Time (8:30pm Eastern/ 5:30pm Pacific). Make a monthly tax-deductible donation of any amount at emancipateyourmind.org .
New donors will be automatically added to the email list every month on the 5th with links to the discussions, exclusive exercises and tools to help you recover faster, and invitations to attend any additional workshops this year for free. To be added to the email list more quickly, please email us at firstname.lastname@example.org right after making your donation and you’ll be added to the list within 24-48 hours.
Live discussions begin Wednesday, January 16th at 6:30pm Mountain time.
BEYOND THE WOUND SUMMIT:
Join us at your own pace this Sunday, January 15th through February 5th, 2023 at our first annual Beyond The Wound virtual summit. Interviews and panels will drop every Sunday from trusted licensed professionals and thought leaders in the religious trauma healing space. Find support and tools to help you move with confidence beyond your religious trauma wounds and into a life of freedom and safety. Go to beyondthewound.com to register, and podcast20 for 20% off your registration fee. We hope to see you there because no one should have to walk the path of healing alone!”
Not ready to donate but still want to join in online community and text discussions? Come join the Emancipate Yourself Facebook group to share your thoughts on today’s podcast and ask more questions.